Last time, when I used to think that anxiety can be controlled easily with a change of thinking
I always though "If he thinks positively, everything would be fine isnt it?"
But I was wrong
Its crippling
Ever felt yourself so overwhelmed with emotions
That your body starts to react to it
Chest tightness, losing senses on your finger tips, getting really restless
No matter what you try to tell you mind
"Hey, you're okay, you'll be fine, its okay, everything is fine"
It just seems to be futile, and sometimes making it worse.
In my mind, I know that everything is alright.
I've read on inspirational books
Learnt how to be positive
Knowing that people I love, love me too and will never leave my side
That, worrying about things that might not happen is stupid.
But that is the scariest part.
I still feel the attacks coming, even though I know all of these.
Sometimes in the train, I am screaming internally for help.
Attacks can go on for 20-30 minutes.
Whats worse is that, thoughts will come at random, and my body immediately reacts to it.
Its not an easy condition to manage
It can be scary, and it can put people off at times.
But I know this is one battle that I have to deal with.
And only by helping myself, then I am allowing people to help me
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